Being Realistic

Things in this life take time. And patience. Oh, the dreaded “P” word. I am probably the world’s most impatient person. Well, at least in the top 10.

I feel like things are normalizing inside of my head finally with TDP. WHEW! What a crazy ride the past few weeks have been. I am glad to be sort of returning to some balanced state. Had an awesome weekend spending time with family, my son and TDP. (not all at the same time, however!!) One night, we watched a movie and the other night we played a board game. He’s into something called “Modern Designer Board Games.” I never knew such a thing existed. But, I love playing games, and it was a lot of fun! I hope we can do it more!!

In the weirdness of the universe, my sister works with one of this dude’s ex-girlfriends. And apparently they are still friends and spend some time together. And this party he invited me to next weekend…it’s this chick’s birthday party! GAH!! I asked him about this and he says that they are just friends and he never was really feeling it when they dated. But the story my sister gets from the ex is totally different and apparently TDP still have feelings for her. And she says that they hang out a lot. So…I’m not sure what to think but realize that the truth is probably somewhere in the center of those. I have no claims to this man, so I have decided to just believe him and keep going. Besides…who cares who he is friends with? I’m sure that he has more than one female friend.

I’m surprised at myself for being able to sort of let that go. In the past, I wouldn’t have. It would have consumed me. But, while I like TDP and enjoy him and our time together, he has no claim on my life. If he walks, he walks. Or, I can walk. I’m not seeing a bunch of potential for long term here. I am starting to sort of care about him, but in a pretty general way like a friend. I wish I could explain myself better. My intense feelings remain, but I feel a bit more level headed today. I guess I just can’t see this going anywhere permanent so that is making me more realistic.

Realistic is good.